dear wrinkley old naked asian ladies in the locker room of my gym ( Read more... )

dear boy,

thank you. seriously. i don't want to go into a whole fuckton of detail here, but you are pretty much the best date ever. and i don't know HOW i managed to luck out and meet a boy like you who is not only wonderful, but is ALSO more than slightly fond of ME. clearly, i am living in some kind of alternate universe where up is down and ( Read more... )

friday night/saturday morning


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Dear NaBloPoMoi don't know what compelled me to participate in your crazy bitch chokehold over my updating activities, but i did it. i posted every day for november. and dammit, that was difficult sometimes, because while i was nursing my awesome headcold, i was ALSO nursing my awesome, raging, pissed-off case of writers' block ( Read more... )

dear tyra banks,i am pretty sure that you're insane. i mean, really, have you watched yourself do television? do you listen to the words that come out of your mouth? no reasonable, sane person would ever say that crap. and that's why i love you ( Read more... )

Dear US Department of Education:


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i'm on my second weekend of waiting tables again, and while it's a welcome change from the drudge of the office, i'm glad to not have to do it anymore unless i want to. today was another double shift, which means i logged eleven and a half hours of running my ass off and missed the UIllinois/Northwestern game, my cousin's birthday, and my friend ( Read more... )

i'm tired as hell, and i cam't imagine why - as i did virtually nothing all day aside from eating ribs, drinking beers and meeting Alex Brown of the Chicago Bears at a local bar that was overrun by small children in the local athletic association's football jerseys for 10-year olds. in what world do small children run around in bars??? and while i' ( Read more... )

dear no-baby sticker/hormone duct tape/birth control ( Read more... )

thank you for being so quiet and empty tonight ( Read more... )